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Dogs on trains? How quaint. How utterly, adorably quaint. Let me tell you, I've seen it all when it comes to travel. I've been in this industry long enough to know that dogs on trains are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to bizarre travel requests. I mean, seriously, people want to bring their dogs on trains? How cute. How charming. How utterly impractical.

Listen, I'm all for animals on trains, I really am. I'm a dog lover myself. But let's be real here, folks. Trains are for humans, not for furry friends. I mean, can you imagine the chaos? The barking, the whining, the accidents on the train floor? No, no, no. Trains are for humans, and humans only. Sorry, Fido, you're just going to have to stay home for this one. But hey, who knows, maybe one day we'll have a special train just for dogs. Wouldn't that be something? The Dog Express. I can just see it now, a train full of puppers, barking and wagging their tails. It's a nice thought, but for now, let's just stick to the humans, shall we?